- The Legacy Letters
- Posts
- The Game That Exposes Your Deepest Truths (And Why You Should Play It)
The Game That Exposes Your Deepest Truths (And Why You Should Play It)
Shadows, Intentions & Conflict
Tommy
March 15, 2025
For the best of everyone, for everyone.
For the best of everything, for everything.
Love and Freedom.
Four months ago, I lost faith in people.
I was stuck—trapped in the same cycles of frustration, distrust, and disillusionment. The world felt cold, and I felt alone in it.
At the time, I was planning to start a community project in Italy.
But something inside me knew I wasn’t ready.
Then, by chance, a friend reached out about a 4-month community program in Colombia.
I had no idea what I was walking into…. I just knew I had to go.
What is El Juego?
Eight years ago, a group of people came together and asked themselves a question… “What is the worst part of ourselves?”
This question became the foundation of their collective culture—one built on trust, radical honesty, and radical empathy.
El Juego is Spanish for The Game. They said the only way to win the game is to have all of your ancestors on your side.
The goal?
To change the internal structures that impede the fulfillment of your potential.
The Fellowship Program… In Essence
The fellowship is designed to force you into deep self-exploration, confrontation, and transformation through community living.
Here, everything about you—the good, the bad, and the hidden—gets mirrored back at you.
The community uses unconventional yet powerful tools to revisit past memories and foster self-awareness/ pattern recognition:
Encounters – Face-to-face confrontations to reveal hidden truths.
Regressions – Revisiting past experiences to understand present behaviors.
Challenges – Physical, emotional, and psychological tests to push your limits.
Constellations – Group work that reveals hidden dynamics within relationships.
Process Circles – Spaces where unresolved conflicts are confronted, not avoided.
No masks.
No escape.
No pretending.
Just you, your patterns, and the raw truth.
My Top 3 Lessons:
1. Find and Embrace Your Shadow
One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.
Everyone has a shadow, but society teaches us to repress it.
Envy
Anger
Selfishness
We all recognize those words.
We all like to think we’re "good people."
But the truth is, whatever we suppress doesn’t disappear; it leaks out…
In self-sabotage.
In passive aggression.
In our judgment of others.
During the program, communal living stripped away my masks. I saw how my triggers weren’t about others—they were mirrors, showing me the parts of myself I refused to own.
How I started integrating my shadow:
Observe Triggers – Every time I judged someone, I asked: Is this something I refuse to see in myself? The answer was always yes.
Own the Uncomfortable – Instead of denying my flaws, I sat with them. I admitted to myself that I am capable of being selfish. I crave control. This honesty was freeing.
Integrate with Action – Rather than suppress anger, I used it to set boundaries. Instead of resenting others' success, I let it fuel my ambition.
Your shadow isn’t your enemy—it’s your untapped power. Face it, and you’ll reclaim the parts of yourself that were always meant to be yours.
2. Your Intention Shapes Your Reality
When you set an intention, the universe conspires to help you achieve it.
At the start of the program, we were asked to set a single intention. Mine was home.
A part of me understood why I chose that word, but everything that followed—every challenge, every breakthrough—revealed more depth about my relationship with it.
I saw how often I had abandoned myself. How much of my energy was spent seeking belonging outside rather than building it within.
That’s when I realized that an intention isn’t just a wish…
It’s a compass.
A filter.
A force that shapes every decision you make.
How to find & set a Powerful Intention:
Ask yourself – What is the one thing I truly seek right now?
Define it – Clarity is key. A vague intention leads to vague results.
Embody it – Act as if it’s already true. Decisions create momentum.
Reinforce it – Write it down. Say it daily. Let it rewire your mind.
Filter through it – Every choice moves you closer or further. Choose wisely.
Commit to it – No half-measures. A weak intention is an escape hatch.
A strong intention forces you to shed distractions and align with your deeper purpose.
Without one? You drift.
Use this to set an intention for yourself, and watch everything fall into place.
3. Every Conflict Is a Mirror
Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
Most people avoid confrontation. In this community, that wasn’t an option.
Everything had to be faced.
Everything!
I remember sitting in a process circle, my heart pounding. Someone had an issue with me, and instead of ignoring it, we had to talk—face to face, in front of everyone. No running. No distractions.
I wanted to defend myself.
To explain.
To justify.
But as they spoke, I realized their words stung because they exposed something true. The conflict wasn’t just between us—it was between me and myself.
When I found myself being defensive, it was clear that it was an old wound—an old conflict that was showing up in my life once again. And each time, that conflict was heavier.
Every external conflict was an internal one projected outward.
Every conflict was an opportunity to confront myself and be better.
How to use Conflict As A Mirror:
Ask Yourself…
Does this person remind me of someone else?
Have I heard this before?
Notice Repeating Patterns…
If the same conflicts keep happening, they’re trying to teach you something.
Lean In, Not Away…
The sooner you confront it, the lighter you’ll feel.
Remember…
If you’re always in conflict with others, you’re always in conflict with yourself.
Looking Forward
You don't win at life.
You remove everything blocking you from living it fully.
El Juego was a crucible—one that burned away illusions and left me face-to-face with what truly matters. Through the fires of confrontation, intention, and deep self-exploration.
I walked away with something invaluable… Clarity.
Clarity about who I am.
Clarity about what I want to build.
Clarity about what’s been holding me back.
Now, I’m integrating everything I learned into The Legacy Blueprint—an eBook I am writing designed to help families create lasting foundations, not just in their homes but in their relationships and future generations.
This is my way of passing the torch.
If you want to be the first to hear about it, subscribe to my newsletter.
If you feel called to experience at El Juego, you can learn more about their programs here: https://eljuego.community/
The work is never finished. But the path is clear.
The question is—will you walk it?